Well, I apologize in advance for the bummer of a post, but, well, you'll understand, and I should update previous entries on the subject.

My little cousin, the one who was diagnosed with brain cancer months ago and has gone through hell since, is terminal now. They discovered that he has a new tumor, this time in his spine. They cannot operate, so it's just a matter of time. I guess six months to a year, they expect. But who knows? I watched cancer take my grandfather so quickly...he was fine, then he was not so fine, and then he was gone. I barely even remember him being "sick" to me as a kid. Then, he was just gone. So who knows how quickly this will move. It's actually kind of odd, because that part of me wants to say, "Hey, you never know, right? Nothing's ever 100 percent," is actually trying to take over.

It's sad. It really is. I hate to spread non-good feelings now, but this is really something that's been on my mind, and since this is my forum, well, too bad. And I feel bad because I want to say something to ease my cousins' pain (his parents), but it's nuts that at times like these you realize how not on their level you are, and that nothing you can say or do can do ANYthing for them. Even, honestly, listening...

I cannot imagine having to deal with this, and I don't want to imagine it. I can't fathom what they're going through. To be basically about to lose your child to anything like this. I just can't fathom it at all.

That is all.