Equal opportunity bashing...

--Suck it, Chicago baseball teams. It's only one game (Cubs game 2 later), but way to represent as poorly as possible in the first games.
--Suck it HARD, Javy Vazquez. If you start another game for the Chicago White Sox, I'm done. You were outpitched today by Clayton (formerly could suck it) Richard. Go back to the Expos. Yes, the Expos. Hell, go anywhere but here. Trade him for a prospect in the offseason.
--Suck it just as hard, Orlando Cabrera. You're a winner? Three popouts and a strikeout (with the bases loaded) after talking shit to Grant Balfour during the at-bat? I wish the bases hadn't been loaded so he could have drilled you in the skull. Dumbass. Bet you won't talk to reporters afterward either, chickenshit. Especially since they'd have asked you about the botched hit-and-run attempt earlier and whether it was your fault or A.J.'s.
--Juan Uribe has already sucked it, so telling him to suck it for striking out with one out and the bases loaded in that same inning would be just a waste of my time. He wasn't terrible other than that at-bat.
--Suck it, Harold Reynolds. From an unbiased standpoint, honestly, my God, he was terrible. I understand the national guys only know so much, but jeez, Reynolds could have done a little bit of homework. He even called Clayton Richard "Richards" at least twice if not more, then admitted he didn't know much about the guy. Thanks, Harold. Thanks, TBS. Thanks a lot.
--Finally, suck it, Tropicana Field catwalks. I saw the ground rules graphic twice in the game, and the announcers couldn't stop talking about the catwalks. They spent more time talking about the catwalks than a whole lot of other things. If I wanted meaningless droning on about the same unimportant topics, I'd request Hawk Harrelson to do the games. At least beat my brain in with Evan Longoria Worship for nine innings rather than "catwalks" talk. My lord. We get it already that this is a weird ballpark.

All that said, it's just one game. Plenty more baseball to be played, and believe it or not, there were some good takeaways:

1. Clayton Richard, who I ripped earlier this half-season, has improved significantly in his last 4-5 outings. That said, I don't know how much I "trust" him...but at least he's on a better track than he appeared on when he first came up.
2. We rocked the crap out of Dan Wheeler in the World Series. He didn't look too overpowering today, even though we didn't do too much against him in the ninth. There's at least a bright spot.
3. We weren't completely overpowered...again, if not for Javy's mistakes, we might have won the game. Let's hope that better pitching from Buerhle, Danks and Floyd will prevail and the rest of the team will keep up their game as they did today.