"Loneliness, that's the bottom line. I was never happy as a child. Christmas Ted, what does that mean to you? It was living hell. Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked, in the head, by an iron boot? Of course you don't--no one does--that never happens. Sorry Ted, that's a dumb question. Skip that."

Get me Rex Kramer!

It's a sad day, folks...